Sunday, January 11, 2009

ijustwanttobehappy..

Yesterday i told Gwen this year is the best Birthday year. I told her i was happy to have frens celebrating wif me and accompany me. I really do feel happy.
For 4years ive been celebrating my Birthday wif the same person. And finally this year, its wif different people.

No Promises...
But today, i think i recieved the worst present ever.
i was happy but after reading it, i feel so hurt, so sad and so disappointed.
Me and Zhu GouGouShou and promised to be honest wif each other, not to tell lies and hide anything from each other. i keep my promise, i didnt tell lies and i nv hide anything. But i don understand why he jus cant control himself and he hide from me. Not once but thrice.
I also noe i don have the rights to stop him from doing wad he want and no rights to control him. But he promise me he wont go there and yet he cant resist but to go again.
He told me he cant promise me anything cuz he is afraid he will break it. And now i understand wad he mean.
I trust no guys after the Break up. I doubt and mistrust them. i have phobia. And the only guy i believe and trust is Zhu. But i dono why he wana do this to me.
He is always there to cheer me up when i am sad and angry. Always there to make me smile and laugh when i am down. He always have his ways to make me happy. He understand me well and noes wad i want. i cant afford lose someone like him. Cuz i never met anyone like him. Someone that noes how to make me happy is very important to me.
I guess i should try to forget about this subject and pretend nothing happen.

- i just want to be happy.
- i noe i am strong and i must not cry even if i feel like crying.
- i don want to get hurt anymore.


小`ⓑⓔⓔ

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